I had my very first baby at home. Halfway through the birth process, I thought to myself, “What in the world was I thinking doing this without drugs?!” In between contractions, I hoped that my husband would be okay with just one child because I was presently making the decision to never give birth again.
Having my first kid was brutal (as first births usually are). Forget everything I learned in my birthing class. I was just hanging on for dear life praying that it would be over soon. If there had been a doctor in the room offering me an epidural that night, I would have eagerly accepted.
Since then, I’ve had 4 more kids at home. (Having kids is a little addicting I suppose.) And I learned something from my first birth that changed the way I labored for the last 4. If you’re a future-mama who’s hoping to give birth drug-free, here’s some tips I’ve learned along the way.
1. Be a Limp Noodle. My mistake with birth #1, was that I braced myself for every contraction. Just like they tell you to relax your arm before a shot, you’ve got to relax your entire body when you feel a contraction coming on. Lie there like a limp noodle. They say if you can keep from clenching the muscles in your face, you’re probably doing good with keeping the rest of your body limp.
2. Embrace the Pain. With birth #1, I tried to white-knuckle it through the pain. I thought I would be tough enough and grit my teeth till it was over. Yeah, I don’t recommend that mode of operation. At birth #2, I decided to embrace the pain. I didn’t mentally reject it; I welcomed the pain, submitted to it, and allowed it to take over. Let the pain do it’s thing, and before you know it, fierceness of that contraction will be done, and you’ll be ready for the next.
3. Don’t Rush It. At birth #4, I personally believe I was too anxious to get the kid out, and bore down too early (that’s when you decide to start pushing the kid downwards). If you do this before you’re at 10cm, it can result in your cervix protesting, getting inflamed, and keeping the kid inside even longer. Take the cues from your body. You feel like you wanna change positions? Do it. You feel like you wanna stay on your hands and knees? Do it. You feel like you wanna push? Do it. Follow your instincts. They’re there for a reason.
4. A Doula. You can hire a doula, or ask a friend. In my opinion, the presence of a sympathetic, experienced natural-birther does a lot for your psyche. Having the support of someone who has been through it before and made it to the other side is very motivating.
5. Do Your Homework. Education=Confidence. Take a birthing class. Read lots of birthing books. Even after I had 4 kids, I felt I needed a confidence booster. So I did all kinds of reading, researching, and relearning to be mentally prepared. Learn all you can about the birthing process, positions, and techniques to help facilitate giving birth. Education will give you the confidence you need.
What advice would you give to a future mama that wanted to give birth naturally? What helped you get through your natural birth?